Four Ways to Rebuild and Reconnect
Red faces. Chairs kicked. Icy silence. Shouting matches. Sputtering, blistering-mad employees throwing their company badges on the table and walking out (or at least threatening to walk). A new curse word added to your lexicon here and there.
Have you witnessed office arguments like these?
I know I have.Maybe you’ve even been in one.
Finding a mentor is one of the most important finds you can make.
Julie, my church youth leader in high school, was such a mentor. She was fun. She could laugh at herself, even at her few extra pounds and love lost on what seemed a never-ending string of almost boyfriends.
She was wise beyond her years, coaching me to focus on my studies (unless there was something more interesting going on), and to wear the skirts with the longer hemlines when I came to church.
How to Re-Engage When You’re Dis-Engaged
Yes, you can do your job with your eyes closed and head nodding to the beat of your trendy playlists, on autopilot all the way.
Hmmm, time for a new challenge? As you contemplate that possibility, and all that a job hop could entail, you are likely feeling a little less than motivated today.
Yet, you’re a well-intentioned, “give them the best that I’ve got” kind of employee, and well, maybe feel a little guilty about the number of times you sneak a peek at the clock or fly by LinkedIn job postings.
What to Do When Your Mentor Isn’t Flexible
A Look at the Rigid Mentoring Meeting
The clock strikes 2:30 p.m., second Tuesday of the month, your mentor’s office. She sits across the table from you, cup of coffee settled neatly on the coaster, and begins with the anticipated, “What would you like to talk about today?” followed by, “Did you get a chance to read the article we planned to discuss?” You’d be okay with this if it wasn’t the same
What to Do When Your Mentoring Meetings Keep Changing
Did you ever have a mentor who didn’t quite make it to your scheduled mentoring meetings?
Where you were going weeks without getting together because of their shifting schedule, or because they were going a hundred directions at once?
Or maybe they’d cut short the meetings you did have because of countless interruptions.
How to Be Strong When Dealing with a Workplace Bully
Workplace bullies don’t pick on powerful people; they pick on people who won’t push back.
Nice, affable men. Kind, honest women.
It doesn’t seem fair, does it? You’re right, it isn’t.
But fair or not, you either have or will encounter in your business dealings, that ONE person, that one toxic person, who doesn’t care about
What to Do When You Don’t Know What To Do
John slammed his fist down on the office table. His face was red as he glowered at Marcus and me.
“This is not the analysis I asked for! Just give me the two-sentence version on why I should buy into your recommendation. And get rid of these spreadsheets. I hate spreadsheets with nonsense like this!”
Marcus hesitated a moment and reached for the
What do you think is the #1 reason people give for not being in a mentoring relationship?
If you said, “I’m too busy.” you are spot on. With work deadlines, home commitments, kids’ extracurricular events, community sign-ups, how can you find the time?
Here’s one thing to Stop Doing and one thing to Start Doing to make mentoring easy for you, save you time, and make it feel like a desirable investment, not a “have to do.”
To start the New Year off well, here are FIVE TIPS that will get you ready to “get mentored”…and successfully!
Before you approach a potential mentor, learn about them. What makes them strong as a mentor and leader? Who have they mentored well previously? Speak to one of their mentees to learn about their experience. A mentor will be impressed that you have done your due diligence on where they shine.
4 Ways to Make Workplace Change Welcome, not Worrisome
“Our dilemma is that we hate change and love it at the same time; what we really want is for things to remain the same but get better.” —Sydney J. Harris
Isn’t that a great quote? We humans are change resistant, whether we will own up to it or not.
Just listen to others around you.
4 Key Benefits of Business Mentoring FOR THE MENTOR
You’re a mentor? Outstanding! You’re doing a great thing. And, of course you invest your time and talent into others for all the right reasons.
You care about your employees.
You want to grow leaders.
You hope to retain talent.
All good and well and, yes, mentoring
In my corporate life, I begged for the chance to mentor millennials.
Why?
Because they were cool.
Not only was the group I worked with hip and up on everything tech and social, they also shaped their workplaces by mentoring each other. Sometimes it wasn’t even called “peer mentoring” by their management. It was just something they did.
Three Ways Walking and Talking Will Recharge Your Business Mentoring Relationship
Your head probably doesn’t drop to the table when your business mentor yammers on about how prolific their career has been, and what you absolutely should be doing to improve yours, but the temptation to nod off is running strong.
Too many times, a mentor “hogs” the conversation or perhaps they zone out and don’t listen very well while you are talking. (Maybe
Would you rather do the polar bear plunge into icy Nordic waters than attend your company’s next “optional business networking event?” (Optional means it is mandatory if you care at all about your future life as a company employee!)
Your boss has cheerily coaxed you, “Come on, it will be fun, you’ll connect with so many new faces.”
Translated: “I know you feel introverted at these things. So do I. Come keep me company and
When I was sixteen, I was beyond ecstatic to inherit my parents’ fairly uncool, many-miled, pea-green colored, ’71 Oldsmobile Cutlass. There was nothing “happening” about the mechanical beast, but it represented something far more than the sum of its well-worn parts.
It stood for LIFE “my own way.” I couldn’t wait to drive off in it, and take on my own road, at my own speed.
Millennials, do you ever feel like that?
Who Has Mentored YOU?
“Who are the older, wiser, calmer souls who’ve been instrumental in your success? Who’s made your life possible?” – Hal Runkel.
(In the US, in 2002, National Mentoring Month began as a way to promote youth mentoring. Now, all of us, in our business and personal lives, employ January as a specific time to thank our mentors.)
I’ll start this 2017 Mentoring Month by
You want:
Employee Retention.
Your employees want:
Personal Ascension.
Boredom Prevention.
Career Extension.
They’re thinking, “Offer me these things, then I’ll talk employee retention with you.”
Leaders, if you’re not proactive, what happens? Your treasured employees hop on LinkedIn, post their resumes, and check them every few hours.
3 Mentoring Guide Rails to Keep Them From Jumping Ship
The swelling statistics are in and they are churning up the corporate seas. Employees are jumping ship right and left in pursuit of clearer, fresher waters. Here are a few stats to shed light on what is likely happening in your end of the pool.
Gallup employee retention survey: 68% of employees in the U.S. are DISENGAGED — meaning they are not involved in, enthusiastic about and committed to their work and workplace. They’re idly dogpaddling through…
Ancient History Quiz Question #1:
Q: Who was the way smart philosopher born in Greece, circa 470 B.C., wearer of fashion-forward long robes, unfortunate consumer of hemlock tea, who likely drove his parents to run for the closest carafe of juice of the vine with his constant barrage of questions?
A: You guessed it! Socrates himself.
Besides laying down the fundamentals of Western logic and critical thinking, Socrates had a few memorable mentees in his day, Plato and Xenophon to name a couple of his high pots.
(GET JAZZED! It’s National Jazz Appreciation Month!) Legendary jazz trumpeter, Clark Terry, 90-plus years old, lies in a hospital bed and appears near death. At his side, Clark’s student, apprentice, admirer and friend, Justin Kauflin, in his early twenties, sits ready with his keyboard. Justin’s seeing eye dog, Candy, also keeps company with the two.
Clark Terry and Justin Kauflin share a powerful bond — a common love for music and a common challenge with losing their eyesight. Justin has been blind since he was eleven years old. Clark Terry is losing his sight and legs to advanced diabetes.
It’s very cool when the woman who gives you lifelong wise words is the woman who gave you life. Oh, the things my mom said that I swore would never take leave from my lips!
But guess what, her voice then, and now, is in my head and, thank the good Lord, I occasionally utter her pearls of wisdom to my own kids.
As teenagers, they palpably cringe at my outpouring of womanly wisdom and check the calendar daily as to how long until college begins; but mark my words, they’ll remember the gems that flowed down, uninvited but precious as gold, from Grandma to Mom to them.
“Would you go with me if we rolled down streets of fire?”
Josh Turner, country singer
“With.”
It’s the simplest little word in the world.
When it comes to mentoring, it is often the most forgotten word in the world.
The word “with” might be short, simple and one of a 150 everyday prepositions in the English language, but it has enormous power to change you and most every relationship you have.
You are walking nonchalantly down the hall at work minding your own sweet business. From the corner of your eye you see the quick movement of another figure moving toward you with purpose.
Surprisingly, your inner fight or flight mechanism kicks in full throttle. Who is this person and why is your heart racing? The form and the stride are familiar, the gleam in her eye you recognize well.
Maya Angelou said, “In order to be a mentor, and an effective one, one must care.”
We lost a powerful voice in the past week when Maya Angelou passed, but her voice will continue on. Ms. Angelou had a life of mentoring and touched the lives of millions who have had joy in reading her works. In the fuller quote below, she speaks to the role of a mentor in her relatable yet eloquent way:
“In order to be a mentor, and an effective one, one must care.
It seems like everyone is thinking about GOALS this past couple of weeks. At least anyone who . . .
has a pulse,
lives anywhere on the planet,
has an interest in a 69.5 centimeter circumference ball that is being kicked madly and passionately all around Brazil.
Hail the World Cup 2014!
And hail the importance of goals.
Ask Chile’s Gonzalo Jaro if goals are important. (His penalty shoot-out kick clanked off the right goal post against Brazil this week. Chile lost out.)
Ask Brazil’s Julio Cesar, the goalkeeper that willed his team to victory in that same matchup. Brazil walked away with the win and advanced to the next round.
“Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.”
– Mark Twain
My grandma used to encourage me to hang around a certain couple of kids in middle school. She felt I needed a good example and boy, was she ever right. Those were the teeter-totter years when a kid could spin off in a wrong direction. Here was a typical late-night conversation around our kitchen table….
Grandma: “Honey, why don’t you spend time with that tall boy, Dan, and that dark-haired girl, Carolyn? They are such nice young kids. That Dan, he’s an excellent example of gentlemanly conduct. And Carolyn, she’s a shining example of a conscientious student. It would be good for you to spend time with friends like that.”
Me: “Because I like Mark and Deb. They are examples . . . in their own way.”
“It was impossible to get a conversation going.
Everyone was talking too much.”
-Yogi Berra
#Mentor, does your mentee invade your space? Maybe want to be a little too close?
Yesterday my friend was talking to me about “close talkers.” You know who they are – the ones who talk excitedly about six inches from your face, laughing, speaking loudly with sweeping gestures. (Unfortunately, you are forced to experience the cheese and onion enchilada they had for dinner the night before. Too Close!)
What’s your first reaction to this person? I’m guessing it’s taking a jumbo step backwards . . . and quickly!
“Risk comes from not knowing what you’re doing.”
– Warren Buffett
“Lori, I’m so excited! My company is starting a mentoring program and my boss has asked me to be a mentor.”
Ryan, an up-and-coming 30-something IT analyst, approached me at a recent speaking engagement and couldn’t wait to tell me his good news.
“Really? That’s great, Ryan. Did your management let you know what’s expected of you?”
His brow wrinkled slightly. “Not really, they just said they’d matched me with someone that needed mentoring. She’s just down the hall from me and new to the company.”
By now, you’ve lost that pesky five holiday pounds, made it to the gym a respectable number of times .
